just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs