Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Randomize
Follow @tfln