let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
