So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
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