I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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