nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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