doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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