so explain again why im purple
no
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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