i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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