haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize