"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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