I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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