would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
