Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.

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(248): View more from Michigan

her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.

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(541): View more from Oregon

my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests

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(757): View more from Virginia

If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(508): View more from Massachusetts

I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.

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(807): View more from Ontario

her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me

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(616): View more from Michigan

Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?

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(407): View more from Florida

My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it

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(404): View more from Georgia

Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.

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