On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
