I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
