There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
