ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize