Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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