Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
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