My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
