You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
apparently the secret to your success is patron
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
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