OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
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I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
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