I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
