i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
