He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
