apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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