I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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