Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Dicks are not precious.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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