Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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