And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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