It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.