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  • If you have a small cock, but are a good guy, you will find someone who wants to be with you. (Please get great at oral, though.) If you have a great sized penis but are an asshole... well, you might get laid, but good luck finding someone to tolerate you for long. (I know, I know, you all think you'll be douchey frat boys forever, but eventually, you'll want a good woman to stick around.)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 12:22pm
  • It's okay, I've got a small one too. Small limp, not even 5" hard.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 2:47pm
  • well thats most unfortunate, darling. I am from and reside in the great state of Texas

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:23pm
  • OMG I'm pretty sure you are talking about my ex hahahahahahha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:01pm
  • id love to find someone with true feelings like you girls -1032

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:33pm
  • what the fuck? why is everyone talking about "dainty" penises? that shits messed up... no guy should prefer the term dainty over small. but whatever, small penises are good for one thing: they make girls laugh. and yeah for the record, the guys with the biggest dicks are less cocky. and i have true, hard evidence to support that claim.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:23pm
  • Sounds small to me 6:44

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:46pm
  • probably less than 4 hard....definitely a grower but not by much...and he had the balls to go along with it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:32pm
  • haha you baby dick loser i bet my litte 8 yr old brother has a bigger dick than you ha meat runs in this family!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 12:24pm
  • 1032, it's hard for us underdeveloped folk, ain't it? -247

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:46pm
  • So what's the bare minimum to qualify as usuable, anyway? Is there a general consensus on that?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 12:27pm
  • hahaha this has happened to me too. big muscular football player, every other part of his body is perfect. too bad i found out he takes steroids the hard way

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:36pm
  • i recently fucked a guy with a tiny penis, it was still great sex. you'd have to have a loose vagina to not be able to feel it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:08pm
  • oh, but they never are (humble, that is)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:32pm
  • hey 3:42 i had 10:32 first. back off bitch

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:29pm
  • i have a 7 1/2 inch penis, know how to make a girl climax, athletic body, junior in college, rich, and handsome. hello ladies

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:53pm
  • Men with short/dainty/small penises need to learn to do other things exceptionally well. No exceptions.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:49pm
  • it was the whole point of the joke 8:56. obviously not interested in fucking random chicks online. i have, however had a roundtrip ticket to skeezerville a long time ago, if you must know

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 10:14pm
  • 7:52, Top of the Empire State Building tomorrow at noon. Good for you? Swear I'm not fugly. Any other requirements?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 1:09am
  • oi - not a dumpster - they take that shit with em, thank you very much. That is the joy of condoms.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:37pm
  • Being on the receiving end quite often, I will be the first to say that the size of the penis doesn't always matter, it's how it's used. But guys, please - if you're big, you still need technique. And foreplay.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:34pm
  • nope...first name starts with an s lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 09 at 9:52pm
  • Haha, I feel like I've said something similar to this before.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:25am
  • with my smaller penis more girls are willing to let me fuck their bum, good on me!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:56pm
  • Wow, why are people so hostile? And obsessed with dicks? Haha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 10:46pm
  • I know that guy I'm pretty sure I do... the smaller the penis (if that's what they wanna call it) the bigger the dick head...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:57pm
  • hahahahahaha, owned.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:22pm
  • omg the guy its about is soooo egotistical. he has a big ass head...in the wrong spot obviously bc if it was right he wouldnt be on here lol. those are the worst kind of guys. little do they know...all girls do is talk about how lame they are

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 7:37pm
  • haahahahaaahhaaahh guys with little dicks are 99% useless

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:31pm
  • hahaha i aim to please, and won't let you down lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:15pm
  • 8:10, 7:52 here. tell me the time and place babe (i do have a screening process though, so if you're fugly, it won't fly)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:14pm
  • 8:42 im living the dream ;)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:44pm
  • sweet dreams mr texas ;)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:42pm
  • its bad enough hes on blast here...wont be sharing any names lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:44pm
  • the minatures never are

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 09 at 7:24pm
  • 10:32 am aww i would fuck you, those girls probably have loose vaginas

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 1:56pm
  • Jonah Falcon has a world record 13.5" penis when erect

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:38pm
  • Nah, I'm new in this convo- I'm from Tx... but definitely had the SAME thing happen to me. Guy was stuck up and so so so cocky... -7:17

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 7:34pm
  • it's always a shame.....guys that are so hot on the outside...and nakey are just scary as hell

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:38pm
  • i hate that moment of disappointment when you realize its not just a little below average, its actually just really small.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:18pm
  • Plenty of girls with little to no tits

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:58pm
  • @5:48 It is a reverse ratio that is ever-present in society today. Say your cock aura adds up to 100. For the normal male, physical and metaphorical would be 50-50. For those with these "dainty" penii, it's usually 40-60, 30-70, 80-20, etc. in favor of the metaphorical cock, or a quality we call "cockiness." The reverse is true for males with large genitalia.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:55pm
  • If your a girl bitchin about a small dick you better have fucking gigantic boobs, you can get surgery to get bigger, guy's can't

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:18am
  • does this guy happen to be from either stamford or trumbull by any chance?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 19, 09 at 6:30pm
  • haha must be about meathball

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:07pm
  • hahahaha i sure hope i am. where in ct, that will help

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 7:23pm
  • ya and also the avg depth of a vagina is only 5-8inches so for all you guys blabbing on about how big your dick is, it doesnt even matter!! you could have a 12 inch dick and still only get 8 inches of it in there! and if you go any further itll just cause pain... which makes you less enjoyable to have sex with than the average sized man!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:53pm
  • She could smuggle a baseball in that thing...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:22pm
  • ewww tiny pricks just no

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:43pm
  • 5:58: So? Having tiny tits has nothing to do with having a tiny cock. I don't stick my boobs in you to make you feel good.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:26pm
  • nah, it was his dick. he needs to stop telling people about "encounters"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:00pm
  • well thats no fun. i hear everythings bigger in texas, but girls are prettier in connecticut =0)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:24pm
  • are you the one with the 8incher

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:41pm
  • 5:58 needs to rethink it. penis and boob size are totally different.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:24pm
  • How many inches are we talking here?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:23pm
  • ^ awe thats so sad...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 10:47am
  • I'd think the same about my boyfriend. And no, I don't have a loose vagina. He's the only guy I've slept with, and he's even told me I'm pretty small. But seriously, a girl can tell when it's below average. Although small is not necessarily a bad thing.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 2:16am
  • oh 8:14 you're so dishonest.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:21pm
  • who the fuck says "penii"? if youre trying to go for the latin it's "penes"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:36pm
  • ive got 12:22 beat. I was teaching swim lessons to 8-10yr olds i was showering off after hear buncha kids laughing i turn around its about 6 of the kids laughing at my penis saying they were bigger.... i looked down 6 of the kids i teach were they told all the kids in the class all the lifegaurds their parents everything i lived in a town of 400 people it was my senior yr of HS.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 1:44pm
  • Holy crap, this shit gets posted, but anything even remotely intelligible brings up an error?!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:09pm
  • high five to 728 and 733.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:34pm
  • don't be a hater. i know my shit's big and i don't need to broadcast a measurement to prove it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:44pm
  • when we say everything is bigger and better in Texas, we mean everything ;)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:34pm
  • i like your style 8:15. are you from connecticut (im simply guessing since its the area code of this text)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:19pm
  • As long as he gets off who cares how small it is?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:27pm
  • 5:40 - why so cocky?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:48pm
  • you're not creepy?...you called it sexual intercourse...that's a one way ticket to skeezer-ville if you ask me

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 8:56pm
  • Ohh yeah, I mean... he would make fun of me for "flaws" I don't even have. He just made up stuff to make himself seem better or too good for me. Then I got in his pants one day... and I just laughed.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 7:42pm
  • wow youre a dirty slut.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:33pm
  • Amen 7:46!! Thick and long is best :) Don't let anyone fool you: size matters AND it's how you use it. It's not an either/or thing.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:57pm
  • i'm lonely, someone should talk to me on aim

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:40pm
  • im still laughing at the asshole who said "penii".

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:43pm
  • i agree...but if a guys a solid 9 and cant use it thats just as bad.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:12pm
  • but i'd rather a guy had a big one then a small one

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:21pm
  • TO LOOSE VAGINAS ***********

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 2:12am
  • 8:06...fail...major fail...epic fail...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 10:12pm
  • Yeah, what is with that? All that talk and then BOOM POW! small penis alert!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:26pm
  • i was talking about my ex...but if youre from ct theres a good chance hes your ex too....lord knows how hes had so many gfs with a peen like that shit.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:05pm
  • "My penis isn't small, she just has a HUGE vagina!"

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:07pm
  • it has less to do with the length of the penis than the girth. you can have an 8 inch pencil and it will do nothing for me. most of the nerve endings are in the first couple of cm entering the vagina. so if you have a 4 inch penis but its thick enough then that'll do. however, think AND long is always best :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:46pm
  • if you have some girth its not that bad. but if you cant use it...its not even worth it.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:05pm
  • are his initials cb?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 21, 09 at 9:34pm
  • 1032 marry me anyway

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:42pm
  • i'll be the judge of that.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:34pm
  • And when I say 80-20, I mean 20-80. Just for consistency.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:56pm
  • 7:34 im from texas Tx too. want to have sexual intercourse? i will please you with my well sized penis ps: i am not creepy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 8:32pm
  • something about a decent size penis that is crooked doesnt sound too appealing 117

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:21am
  • arrogant guys with small cocks are the worst

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:17am
  • i thought the 8:06 post was going to end in a bell-end or something.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 4:24am
  • there is nothing worse than a small penis. ugh. men with small penises should just die

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:04pm
  • your all a bunch of selfish sluts, nothing wrong with having a tiny penis - god can't bless everybody

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:56pm
  • not according to texas

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:32pm
  • i just took a giant shit while reading this. i feel much better now

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:46pm
  • that's a little cocky for someone who prob has a small penis to begin with jackass

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 9:04pm
  • iTo use the extremely lame cliche "It's not the size of the boat it's the motion of the ocean" only "it takes a long time to get to England in a row boat." If the guy discusses his penis and its size while out in public, it's probably small.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:33pm
  • I didn't say there was anything wrong with a small or dainty cock. I just said you need to do other things very very very well. Also: 5:55? It's not a race and there are no points awarded for fast and efficient. Douchebag.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:18pm
  • believe me it was tiny.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:20pm
  • i know exactly what you mean!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 3:49pm
  • She told him to give her 8 inches and make it hurt. He had to fuck her 4 times and punch her in the mouth.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 1:17pm
  • SMALL DICKS ARENT EVEN WORTH THE FUCK- INSECURED BOYS ALWAYS RESORT TO A LOOSE VAGINAS 2- HOW SAD THAT U CANT JUST FESS UP N SAY HEY I HAVE A SMALL DICK !!!! INSTEAD OF BLAMING OTHERS FOR UR SHORT CUMMINGS- LOL

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 2:10am
  • im still waiting for 753

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:10pm
  • what did you do, go to the mirror and measure your shit? average is like 5 or 6 inches, so if youre just under 8 take a wild guess.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:38pm
  • I'm a sex machine. Small, fast, and efficient.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:55pm
  • Hello, I believe I am the fellow about whom this text message was written. I like to describe my member as "dainty," as "small" is quite demeaning.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:40pm
  • whats their 1% usefulness for?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:32pm
  • i think every girl/boy does lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:19pm
  • 7:33 loving the jeff foxworthy quote

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 2:46am
  • agreed, receiving cum dumpster

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:35pm
  • 5:22 I've tried that on a girl, except with a softball. It got halfway. It was gross but did create kind of a legacy in my frat...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:28pm
  • 6.5 in. gets the job done for me.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 9:41pm
  • BAHaha! You're talking about my ex. Seriously.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 7:17pm
  • 7:27 I dunno, maybe the girl who didn't get off because she couldn't feel anything, save for the pathetic dribble at his "climax."

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:28pm
  • probably less than 4 hard....definitely a grower but not by much...and he had the balls to go along with it

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:29pm
  • 6:18. It's a joke, son. Haw haw haw. Sex Machine, ideal machines are ... oh fuck it. Nevermind.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:21pm
  • I have had Large to the point of past the bellybutton to small as in WTF? It's all in the presentation and intention. The biggest guy can be impressive, but the smallest can be the modt sincere, and sincerity is a definite turn-on

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 18, 09 at 3:47am
  • I may not hit bottom but I can sure bust the sides out that tuna can

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:12pm
  • I'm a sixer with a rather intruiging left twist kinda thing. It's straight but does a half spin. I like to think I'm athletic!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 1:17am
  • And if you're smaller. Please, please use a smaller condom? There is nothing more traumatic than having to fish a lost condom out of your lady bits (plus, no quicker way for the dude to get his ass dumped)...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:41pm
  • Is 7 3/4" a good size?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:35pm
  • i'm sorry but i'd fuck a girl before i'd fuck a small and dainty penis

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:14pm
  • 5:55, are you saying that larger guys aren't cocky? bwahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:04pm
  • Larger guys are only as cocky as we can rightfully be with people who know we can back it up... usually. If you're hanging around in bars or frat houses, you're gonna get cocky douchecrusts no matter what.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:08pm
  • i have an extremly small and skinny cock. i have had girls tell me that they cant feel a thing and there is nothn i can do about it. worst part is im good looking so i get laid and its all over campus that i have a childs penis

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 10:32am
  • Firstly, ladies want a nice sized cock, its true, but if you junk is a monster 9in and thick to boot, you'll just wind up hurting most chicks when you starting hitting pelvis or they start bleeding from being ripped open...Secondly, as a dude, you simply have to know how to use your penis when having sex (i.e. If you know what you are doing/what positions work best for you then you'll please her every night)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:43pm
  • 8:24, anything is possible

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:28pm
  • how about 6 inches long and 4 inches wide?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:59pm
  • hahahahaha nope...close tho

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 20, 09 at 5:57am
  • 605, how small was it?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 15, 09 at 6:23pm
  • 8:21, perhaps i am, but you'll never know

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:24pm
  • Sure, if you mean soft.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 6:37pm
  • or maybe you should be more humble with your monster vagina

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:04pm
  • Dainty, huh? Golly, that right there sure is manly, I tell you what.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:44pm
  • i need me a hot Texas boy like 8:23

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 8:25pm
  • its not small, its tactical.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:15pm
  • wow i know just what you mean.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:14pm
  • hahahahahaha i think you are talking about my exboyfriend here...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 5:07pm
  • don't ever let a girl tell you size doesn't matter!! it does!!!! we girls talk about these kinds of things with each other.. who wants to tell their girlfriends that their new man has a 3 inch ween? bahaha.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 14, 09 at 7:10pm
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