More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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