their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
wanna go halves on a baby?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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