The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
