never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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