Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
