wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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