I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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