I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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