He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
