let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
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