Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
