then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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