I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
