hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
