carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
