Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
pop tarts are not kleenex
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
