My nipple is on Facebook.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
40s are totally the cure
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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