in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize