im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
